I entered August optimistically. I was scared and nervous for my upcoming preventive mastectomy and breast reconstruction, but ultimately optimistic for the outcome that was being laid out in front of me. On the way to the hospital I felt nothing but gratefulness and luck. Surgery was seemingly uneventful, but my recovery at home was anything but. I was having a hard time. Read on and share my story if you think it could help someone else. ~Love to you all!!
I started to actually think about being "prepared" I realized that I don't know as much about this next step as I thought I did. My husband and I have a great understanding of the "what" and the "how" of what's to come, but we don't really have a good handle on the aftermath of it all. Everybody's experiences are different and reading different women's journeys is both helpful and frightening at the same time. So, this morning I started to think of everything I didn't know. My head was spinning.
I never expected anyone to pay attention to my little blog (again, it's therapy- but thank you for reading and following it) and I really didn't expect the amount of community support that came with it. People checked in on me, made our little family dinner, dropped off milk, offered my kids fun days, and sent me messages via Facebook, texts, and phone calls. I even got a handful of beautiful cards from friends and family; near and far. Friends and neighbors dropped off surprise flowers, homemade cookies and breads, mochas, and even prosecco. I loved the sweet intentions that went with each one, but more importantly I appreciated the time that people took to even think of us during their busy days, let alone to drop something off. From the bottom of my heart (and the four others in my home), thank you. Even though it doesn't seem like enough.
I love to redecorate. If you come to my house, it's quite probable that the next time you come, furniture will be moved around, a room will be repainted, or some new accessory will be showcased on a couch or a shelf. Last week, I was ready for new wall art. But I felt stuck and needed a little help. When I get stuck in design, there is only one person to call~my friend, neighbor, and fellow redesign extraordinaire, A!
I was left with the nagging feeling that maybe we didn't do everything on our summer bucket list. It was an extensive list and after all my kids are big thinkers, but I checked the list and we really only had a few things left to do. That's when it hit me, their idea of a perfect summer evolved from the "Summer Bucket List" we made in May. That list changed as they grew up right in front of me..but I never stopped to update it. I looked at the list as my big "To-Do List". I was just checking things off the list, so that they wouldn't gripe at me in August. But, here we are.. griping...in JULY. Cue the mommy guilt.