It's no secret that I have been feeling lost and wayward over the last few months. I was trying to find myself again. I have been sorting through all the "life clutter" to rediscover my purpose and find my center. Thankfully, I have learned that this phenomenon happens to all of us from time to time, for different reasons. We get a little caught up in moment-to-moment living and forget about the big picture. It helps me to know that I am not the only one feeling this way. Maybe that helps you, too. Today, I want to share with you what I have learned on my path of rediscovery.
Whenever I am feeling lost or in need of direction I do one of three things: call my mom, drink wine with my girlfriends, or go to the library. I needed some insight so a trip to the library was in order! With three kids in tow, we made our rounds through the children's department and finally ended up at the Self-Help shelves for me.
Have you ever had the problem of having too many options? Having endless opportunities? Having the ability to go in any direction and accomplish any goal? I am talking about both big and small goals. It's a real problem for me. I know that sounds like I am whining, but it's really a big deal. And yes, I realize this is a total first world problem, but hear me out because you might see yourself in me. When I was a kid, I knew exactly what I wanted to be when I grew up. I had two, very specific dreams.
My oldest daughter loves being in the kitchen. She also LOVES to sing and perform, create new things with fabric, glue and paint, and design fashions fit for a runway. Over the weekend, she decided to make a variety of different items.
Our family had a busy Sunday. Our oldest daughter had a rock concert through her local School of Rock. They had an awesome show and she had her best show yet! We were on our way home when our son started complaining of a headache and a sore throat. I had a mean mom moment and told him he couldn't have a sick day since I had to go into work the next day.
The Human Experience. We are all a part of it. We all want to be involved, make a difference, do something that matters, be recognized, and sometimes do nothing. You can choose to sit idly by or get up and get something done, but none of that really matters when you look at humanity across the globe and across time. To me, the human experience isn't what we do. It is in who we are and how we connect with others. It's in the vulnerable moments that keep us honest and open to each other. Being vulnerable is open to interpretation. In one form, it means putting yourself out there in a way that could draw criticism or a divide between you and a good friend, your lover, close social circles and even across social media.
If you walk into my house, you'll be greeted by a cheerful entryway and a clean and tidy front room and dining room. However, if one were to gaze past the comfy couch, you would find my mess. It's not always like this, but about every three months or so life just seems to "pile-up" in the form of papers, unfinished projects, art supplies, books, teaching materials, bills and receipts to file, notes, my kids' school papers, old to-do lists, and remnants of unfinished plans, and more. Here it is, in all it's ugly and messy glory...