I went to bed sad about near end of the preschool stage of my parenting years. Only to get a surprise the next day...her school doesn't start until next week. OH...MY...GOSH! I was only thinking two things at this moment; one- I did all that worrying and feeling sad for no reason and two-it was my first #mommyfail of the new school year.
My kids go back to school tomorrow. The beginning of the year, always hits me with a ton of emotions. For one, I miss the excitement I used to feel setting up my classroom, collaborating with my team of teachers, and meeting my students for the first time. And as a parent, another school year means they are one year closer to not needing me anymore. This year, I will have a 4th grader, 3rd grader, and a preschooler.
Then, I get a quick little ping on my phone, a text alert. With a simple "YES!" to the question, "Do you want to have ribs with us tonight?" BAM, our day was set! I could see it now, the kids could lounge around and play while Jeff and I got some piddly work done around the house. Then, he could run to the store while I started baking one of two desserts. Once everything was baked and the salad was tossed, we'd walk across the street for dinner... perfect!! I loved the way this day was shaping up, and all by 9:04AM! Not long after that the buzz of neighborhood play was all around me. Boys and girls were in and out of my house in a swirl of summery fun. The sun was out, bikes were zooming down the block, and good old-fashioned play was happening.
Early on, we made a conscious decision to change some words in our house. We always make sure to say our kids have "strong legs" that help them cartwheel, run, and kick. And we are especially careful about saying the "F" word- fat. That is a banned word in our house. I used to say it a lot, but as soon as we heard the kids say it, we realized that the word fat needed to be exiled from our home. It's not that I don't want them to know the word, but rather I don't want them to associate themselves with the word.
I was left with the nagging feeling that maybe we didn't do everything on our summer bucket list. It was an extensive list and after all my kids are big thinkers, but I checked the list and we really only had a few things left to do. That's when it hit me, their idea of a perfect summer evolved from the "Summer Bucket List" we made in May. That list changed as they grew up right in front of me..but I never stopped to update it. I looked at the list as my big "To-Do List". I was just checking things off the list, so that they wouldn't gripe at me in August. But, here we are.. griping...in JULY. Cue the mommy guilt.
Do you ever have those days (or weeks) where you just think, how did I get here? Where am I going? What am I doing? Why am I doing this? There have been times that I just want to hit PAUSE so that I can think, process, and act before another minute passes me by.
Earlier this week, Jeff and I were heading home from a road trip out west. We were frustrated by the lack of coping skills our three children showed when dealing with disappointment. During the final 400 miles, we analyzed our kids and all the conditions that lead to their emotional state. We ultimately saw that our…
Jeff and I called a "family meeting" tonight. It was our first "official" one as a family of 5. The idea came about on our way home from our road trip to the west. All the kids had finally fallen asleep and that meant... we could finally talk about them! We had been on the road for the last 8 days driving from Chicago to Albuquerque, then Santa Fe, back to Albuquerque, and a quick stop in Roswell before finally heading to the Dallas area. For the most part, everything we shared was pretty good. They were very well behaved, polite and helpful, didn't ask for too much and they were actually appreciative of everything we did with them. However, there was one thing we noticed throughout the whole trip... our children's inability to deal with their own emotions calmly-especially when dealing with disappointment.
In this ugly moment, I can either persecute myself or I can practice self-grace. Today, I choose to practice giving myself grace.
Summer is here! I finally get all three of my kids home! When I was teaching elementary school, I couldn't wait for summer to get here. It meant that I could be with my then 2 children, all day long! Now that I am a full-time mom, summer can't get here fast enough. It's not that I am looking forward to the fighting and the mess, but rather the memories we'll make making the messes and the lessons we'll learn from learning to disagree. More importantly, I am looking forward to not having a schedule and to doing what we want, when we want. This is the Summer of Wonder.
no happy accidents 